great Christmas presents for your blind friends
buckeyecat at columbus.rr.com
buckeyecat at columbus.rr.com
Wed Nov 30 20:45:28 PST 2011
Wondering what to give yourself or a blind friend for Christmas this year?
Here are some suggestions you'll want to avoid. None of these is on my
Christmas wish list! However, I send this advertisement to you, wrapped in
scientific maxi Morris aids
The following products coming soon to the JW independent scientific
maxi Morris aids catalogue. These products will be great to help with
your everyday life!
Talking dentil floss:
Spanish-English versions available with helpful prompting from this
floss. your teeth will never be the same!
"one grubby molar
two grubby molars"
and so on until all your teeth are free from debris !
Braille Toilet Paper!:
This tactile tissue contains the meaning of life on each roll!
Read your way to a wiser you while you use the Braille to help with
other things that aren't so pleasant!
This comfortable toilet tells you when the lid is up or down and if
it's #1 or #2! No more thinking about what you are doing now your
mind can concentrate on more important things like that odd mumbling sound
Our top of the line talking commode has the added comedy feature .
It will make snide remarks about your physique when you have your back
Talking toilet brush not included!
These wonderful talking shoes tell you just what you are walking on
or stepping in! Identifies things such as grass, sidewalks, pavement, and
Shoes come in brown white and in English and Spanish Product
produced by JW independent scientific maxi Morris aids Distributed by
Pay More shoe store
This chatty piece of furniture will keep you company on those rainy
nights. The sofa will chat about the weather latest sports scores or
even commiserate with you on that bad day at work!
Manufacturer not responsible for sofa rudeness after gas is emitted
The JW independent scientific maxi Morris aids company has worked
together with Hot pool appliances to produce this innovative product!
Know exactly how hot your cook surface is by quickly reading the
Braille display found in the center of each heating element. Oven
temperature is found inside the oven door.
Not only does this product make preparing that meal easier but it
also helps your Braille reading speed.
A new category of products will appear in our new catalogue.
You asked, we listen. Here at JW independent scientific maxi Morris aids
we have answered the requests for occupational products specifically
designed with the blind in mind.
For that up and coming professional racecar driver, we are perfecting r
new pit finder. Never miss the pit row again! This highly developed system
uses a GPS system to locate your designated pit stop. An audible tone is
heard when approaching pit row. As you approach your designated pit stop,
the beeps become higher in pitch and frequency. This product not yet
effective in locating members of the pit crew.
For those visually impaired surgeons on your holiday list, our new
talking scalpel will be a perfect gift. This talking scalpel has a
clear female voice. A cut above the other competitors on the market,
our new scalpel tells the surgeon to keep cutting. "Oh, no. Not
there!" is heard when the wrong area has been approached with this
intelligent surgical tool. No blind surgeon should be without this.
As heard on TV. The talking chainsaw is very popular among our
customers. This tool is easy to operate. Taped instructions included.
Simply place your finger under the cutting guide to ensure the length of
the proper cut.
Begin cutting immediately to allow the best results. This tool has
considerably increased the coordination and reaction time of its users. A
clear male voice announces the depth of the cut. Four D batteries not
Metal detecting long, white cane.
This innovative mobility device beeps when metal has been located.
Tap, tap, swing, swing, your way to riches!
Don't overlook that penny again. This portable cane only weighs a
mere 17 pounds.
Four rechargeable D batteries included with this item. Charger sold
For the dog guide user. Get Fido a pair of these stunning shades.
On those bright days when your pup can't see the color of those
traffic lights due to the glare, the dark glasses will provide
protection from the harmful UV rays of the sun. Fido will never miss
the red light again! Made from durable, scratch resistant plastic.
Protective case sold separately.
These news items written with tongue firmly planted in cheek.
No item here is intended for use by the actual public and any
resemblance to past or future or even current products is merely
The staff of blind-Novel-Tees
More information about the Jokes